Re-thinking Negative Thought Patterns
Negative thinking patterns and cognitive distortions can manifest as incorrect assumptions, unrealistic self-criticisms, and even the denial of reality. Yet, the effects of this thinking can be all too real for someone struggling with their mental health.
Another activity to try is identifying negative automatic thought patterns. Sometimes we may get stuck interpreting negative or distressing situations similarly without examining the evidence for that interpretation. Below are some common negative thinking patterns – see if any of them sound familiar or are ways of thinking you notice yourself engaging in. If so, practicing reappraisal when you find yourself thinking in this way might be helpful!
Types of Common Negative Thoughts:
· ALL-OR-NOTHING THINKING: You seethings in black-and-white categories. If your performance falls short of perfect, you see yourself as a total failure.
· OVER-GENERALIZATION: You see a single adverse event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.
· MENTAL FILTER: You pick out a single negative detail and dwell on it exclusively so that your vision of all reality becomes darkened, like the drop of ink that discolors the entire beaker of water.
· DISQUALIFYING THE POSITIVE: Your eject positive experiences by insisting they “don’t count” for some reason or other. In this way, you can maintain a negative belief contradicted by your everyday experiences.
· JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS: You make a negative interpretation even though there are no definite facts that convincingly support your conclusion.
· MIND READING: You arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you, and you don’t bother to check this out.
· FORTUNE TELLING: You anticipate that things will turn out badly, and you feel convinced that your prediction is an already-established fact.
· EMOTIONAL REASONING: You assume that your negative emotions reflect how things are: “I feel it. Therefore, it must be true.”
· SHOULD STATEMENTS: You try to motivate yourself with should and shouldn’t . The emotional consequences are guilt. When you direct such statements toward others, you feel anger, frustration, and resentment.
· LABELING AND MISLABELING: This is an extreme form of over-generalization. Instead of describing your error, you attach a negative label to yourself. “I’m a loser.” When someone else’s behavior rubs you the wrong way, you attach a negative label to him” “He’s alouse.” Mislabelling involves describing an event with highly colored and emotionally loaded language.
· PERSONALIZATION: You see yourself as the cause of some adverse external event, which you were not primarily responsible for.”
Unlike self-defeating beliefs, negative thinking patterns are not always with you. Instead, they only surface when you are faced with an issue. Also known as cognitive distortions, these negative thoughts come to mind during times of stress and reinforce your self-defeating beliefs.
Luckily, we can slowly train ourselves over time on how to think by implementing simple techniques. Below, Forbes Coaches Council's coaches offer guidance on how to get started.
Replace the Negative Thoughts
We don't overcome negative thought patterns; we replace them. For most of us, those negative thought patterns are well-worn neural pathways. Four simple steps:
- Notice when you have started the pattern.
- Acknowledge that it's a pattern you want to change.
- Articulate what you want to be different.
- Choose a different behavior —one that serves your goals.
We are mean to ourselves. Nearly 90% of self-talk is negative. Three steps:
- Release it. Let it out to help the process, not to dwell. Three minutes, then the pity party is over.
- Track it. Identify when you have negative thoughts. Awareness will enable reframing.
- Reframe it. Once you know why you are being mean, consider what your best friend would say to you. Then tell yourself what you need to hear.
Ways to replace negative thought patterns
· Write instead of think Write down why the negative thought is present.Writing versus thinking helps purge the idea; when you see the words on paper or a screen, it is easier to make sense of it and move forward. · Make a conscious effort to find things to love, like, and appreciate Instead of fighting negative thoughts, consciously reach for better feeling thoughts. One powerful way to do that is to speak (out loud if you can) about what you love, like, and appreciate—heading into a tough talk? · Ask yourself some tough questions
- What do I get from having negative thought patterns? What's the reward for me?
- What do I lose by engaging in negative thoughts?
- What are the costs?
- What benefits would I receive from engaging in positive thoughts? What costs are associated with thinking more positively?
- What made me think negatively in my past?
- What will I do now?
· Establish new habits Rather than thinking of it in terms of "overcoming" negative thought patterns, think of it in terms of establishing new habits. You do that by directing your attention to subjects with nothing to "overcome": issues you already feel good about and think positively about.
· Stop watching the morning news Research has shown that just three minutes of negative news in the morning will significantly increase your chances of a negative experience over the course of the day. Research has also shown that a positive mindset increases productivity and satisfaction while reducing error rates. Mindset is a choice, but not always an easy one.
· Use affirmations When you wake up, open your eyes and feel gratitude for the new day. Write down daily affirmations: "I love the people I work with," "I make positive contributions every day," or "I am open to inspired thoughts." If a negative thought creeps in, think of your success and the feeling that went with it.
· Focus on gratitude Gratitude is underrated by most but is essential to a happy life. Life doesn't get easier, but we become more robust as we reframe difficulties by recognizing all the little good things happening around us.
· Try movement and meditation You can't escape negative thoughts without physically disrupting them. To get out of your head, get into your body. A few minutes of deliberate breath work (seated 10-15minute meditation) or body movement (like an exercise class) can disrupt those thinking patterns. To get out of your head, move more.